TEACHERS AND THE TAUGHT

Not very fond of teachers, 

and they were never really fond of me. 

All I can remember of my teachers 

(this includes my parents, siblings, husband and kids

 - and sometimes, friends) 

is their hauling me up for something or the other. 

They seemed quite convinced I was edges all over, 

needing trimming and shaping

Did I learn anything from them? 

Have to admit grudgingly, everything I know.

 

EXCUSE ME

 

 

It's my immaturity

My lack of control

How convenient the excuse!

And yet it's true

we are not always 

masters of ourselves

and every act of evil

that fell our way

governed by 

someone's lack of control

or our own.

I WISH

 

I wish Love would conform

to its definition 

of being the most gentle of emotions

of being unconditional, unselfish

understanding, giving

patient and kind

instead of the way

it seeks revenge, competes

desires...lusts

fights, scratches

keeps score and scorns

but all Love seems to know

and say

is no matter what

its here to stay

PAIN

Not around the periphery of my womb

nor around the circumference of my heart - 

fusing the hemispheres of my brain

so they function as on

with only one thought.

Across the skies and oceans and streams and mountains and deserts and the Universe...and beyond

even permeating the sanctum sanctorum of my innermost self

I never drew boundaries that would not let you in,

and yet

Today I stand

holding on to a tiny straw

with fear lest even that tiny little window of hope 

that you have left me holding on to so tight

be taken away.

 

My soul has a hearing

I deny all the time

but I can’t explain

away the pain

when you shout

for no reason or rhyme

My soul has a sight

I deny all the time

but I can’t explain

away the pain

when you slap

for no reason or rhyme

My soul has a voice

I deny all the time

and it tells me again

and again

walk away when you’re made to cry

for no reason or rhyme.

 

As I grow older

I am more empathetic

towards my own soul

for years I have let her bear

the brunt of my living

bearing her down and demanding

she put up with vile and disrespect

be taken for granted

trampled upon

and passed over

But now, as I grow older

she is all that matters

ensconced within me my soul

childlike, pure and sacred

do not fly away yet

Life is not done.

 

UPHEAVAL

 

Foam in every wave

so measured...rising high

Aiming for the shore

in smooth descent

Everlasting music of the waves

reaching my feet

As I wait with bated breath

welcoming the touch of cool water

Waves, take away my miseries with you

when you recede to the horizon

And leave my Spirit renewed.